The Obvious

a tad chilly

Posted in life by theobvious on November 23, 2014

So it’s winter in Jerusalem. That means that it’s chilly outside and my apartment has Gone Cold.

It’s so cold that the goosebumps have become permanent. I now have dragon skin.

It’s so cold that I can’t peel off the blanket long enough to put on more clothes.

It’s so cold that I have to add a jacket when I come in, not when I go out.

It’s so cold that for polite company I’d need two padded bras one on top of the other.

It’s so cold that I only know my toes are freezing by seeing that they’re blue, haven’t felt them in days.

It’s so cold that I begin every workout wearing layers and only take them off half an hour in.

It’s so cold that I go to bed fully dressed because the covers are too icy to the touch.

It’s so cold that I can almost see what little breath comes through my perma-stuffed nose.

It’s so cold that I take 30 minute showers because I can’t bring myself to switch off the scalding water.

It’s so cold that food is refrigerated both in and out of the fridge.

It’s so cold that fruit become less ripe if left alone for a while.

It’s so cold that my tea gets undrinkable less than halfway down the mug.

It’s so cold that my heart is turning to ice and I’m about to steal Christmas.

It’s so cold that I’m about to go outside to warm up a little bit. If I can get myself to take off the PJs, robe and blanket so as to dress. I’ve been known to leave the house wearing PJs disguised as real clothes for this precise reason. All this because we live in Such a Hot Country that built-in heating is simply unnecessary, so houses come without it. Blame it on the warm effing Mediterranean climate.

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